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Art Handler's Olympics

March 23, 2010 by Marion Maneker

Finally, an event that pierces to the heart of the art world. The art handler’s Olympics gets the full New York Times treatment:

The event, the first-ever Art Handling Olympics — a combination roast, “Jackass”-style stunt extravaganza and excuse to drink a lot — drew about 200 people at its height who came to the Ramiken Crucible gallery to watch a dozen four-man teams (art handlers are, by and large, male, and, by and large, large) go head-to-head, demonstrating their skills with a lot of fake art and untold amounts of Bubble Wrap.

[…] Ted Riederer, an artist, former art handler and one of the event’s organizers, […] took on the role of a cruel German curator, wearing a tight houndstooth suit and sunglasses, shouting abuse at the handlers like “Nein! Nein!” and “Hold it higher, higher, a little higher!” and “I pay you people to do this?”

A qualifying round in which teams were required to tape together an art box and wheel one of their members around a city block inside of it, and to stop midway to wolf down Chinese pork dumplings and throw back shots of whiskey, weeded the teams down to four.

The next events — a speed competition to hang framed works of art (with sadistic measurement requirements like 9 15/16 inches) and a contest called the “static hold,” in which handlers had to keep framed pieces of lead weighing 50 or 60 pounds held against a wall while Mr. Riederer barked orders at them and took a leisurely cellphone call in the midst of their grunting labors (“Ah, yes, hello darling, Basel, yes”) — left only two teams for the final round.

Ready, Set, Hang: The Heavy Lifting Is On (New York Times)

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